The Work
Couples therapy here combines somatic psychotherapy and the Gottman Method. This means the work addresses two levels at the same time.
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The relational level
How you communicate, repair conflict, support one another, and build friendship and shared meaning.
The nervous system level
What happens in the body when conflict begins. Escalation, shutdown, defensiveness, and emotional flooding are nervous system stress responses rather than communication problems.
As these responses slow and become visible, couples can begin to respond to one another differently. Safety increases and connection becomes easier to restore.
At its core, this work helps couples move from reacting to each other to understanding and supporting each other again.
Gottman Relationship Assessment and Treatment Plan
Couples beginning this work start with a detailed Gottman assessment to understand the relationship clearly before moving forward.
This assessment provides a comprehensive picture of the relationship, drawing on decades of relationship research to map patterns of communication and conflict, strengths within the partnership, and the relational histories that shaped each partner prior to the relationship.
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It makes clear what is working and what is not.
The information gathered allows the work to proceed with clarity and direction, helping the work focus on the deeper issues shaping the relationship.
The process includes:
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Gottman Relationship Checkup questionnaire (completed individually online, 30–60 minutes)
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Joint relationship interview (1 hour)
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Individual interviews with each partner (1 hour each)
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Feedback session and treatment planning (1 hour)
Gottman Relationship Assessment and Treatment Plan: $1,500
Ongoing Couples Therapy
At the end of the assessment process, we meet to make sense of what has emerged and identify the areas most important to work on.
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If we decide to continue, couples sessions are typically 90 minutes and held weekly initially so the work can develop momentum.
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For many couples, I recommend working consistently over a defined period, often around 12 weeks, before reviewing where things stand and what, if anything, is needed next.
What this work helps couples rebuild
Couples often notice:
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conflict becomes less reactive and more workable
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repair happens faster after disagreement
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emotional safety increases
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warmth and affection return
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sexual connection often improves as safety grows
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both partners feel more understood and less alone in the relationship
Conflict is inevitable in close relationships.
The work is to build a relationship capable of holding it.
A note about starting couples therapy
Most couples feel some hesitation before beginning this work. It is common for one partner to feel more ready than the other, or to worry that therapy will turn into a place where one person is blamed or old arguments are repeated.
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That is not the aim of this process.
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My role is not to take sides, but to help the relationship itself become stronger and more workable for both partners. The focus is on understanding the pattern that the two of you have become caught in and learning how to change that pattern together.
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When the pattern becomes visible, it becomes something the relationship can work with rather than something that keeps pulling you apart. From there we begin building a stronger foundation together where trust, friendship, emotional safety, and repair are strong enough to support the relationship through the pressures of life.
Is this the right fit?
This work tends to suit couples who:
• still care deeply about the relationship
• are willing to look at their own patterns
• want practical tools as well as deeper emotional repair
• are open to working consistently for a defined period
If there is ongoing violence, active addiction chaos, or other safety concerns, stabilisation comes first. This can be discussed during the consultation.